27 months.

dear lane.
you're two. it's been an exhausting weekend. maybe i haven't been fully fair, i've had a headache and unfortunately my attitude is affected when i don't feel good. i've learned something about life, there can be really bad moments in really good days and really good moments in really bad days...unfortunately, this past week we've had just really good moments.

last time we came back from vacation was, what i thought, one of the hardest weeks. i (thought) i had mentally prepared myself for another week like that but yet again, it was hard. this week you've learned to tackle...you're brother. you think he shouldn't be allowed to play with any toys and that you should hit him (hard) in the head with them. you also think his head is a good spot to kick while we're in the car. you love him, just in a rougher way than what we'd like.

you're our first born and i so fear we're being harder on you than we should. how do we discipline without making your heart hard, i've yet to figure it out. i try to remind myself that you're only two. other times, you get away with much more than i'd like to share. by the time i comfort you're brother, it's easier to just let it (whatever happened) go then to start the crying all over again. so many times this week i've broken down in tears, feeling totally defeated by your two-ness. we've prayed, prayed, and prayed that we can be the parents He wants us to be for you.

i write this not to whine...or complain about you. but to remind myself to cherish the challenges and journey in what a single day brings. you make me so happy. when you smile, the stress of the whole day goes away...and oddly, my headache goes too. when you run from across the room to just say hi and give me a hug, and tug and tug on my shirt till i lean down and give you one, my world is so complete.

yes lane, its true, you have sweet moments even on your most frustrating days. but remember my little boy, there is no amount of challenge, no amount of stress, no amount of disobedience or anything else that could make me love you less.

thank you for being two. i wouldn't not want you to be.
love, mama.

baby, baby, baby...toddler.

ok folks, i really did try to narrow down the pictures but there are still so many. enjoy!

last week the boys(lane&gage) and i, loaded up in the car with bampa and drove to nebraska. dana had been there for a week already with the twins and it was killing me, ok not really killing, but i was honestly so sad to not be there. vance even brought home flowers one day because i had called bawling. (poor vance has an emotional wife these days) it was a house FULL of babies. we hadn't seen the twins since may, when they were three weeks old. my have they changed and are just precious. i could go on and on about them. i love being an aunt.
dana and i talk everyday on the phone, we keep eachother filled in with our kids and are always offering advice or hearing one anothers concerns(or complaints). but somethings you have to be in person to know, phone calls just don't cut it. like...how owen refuses his pacifer or how he was backwards in his crib. or how addie's smiles are huge, all the way down to her toes. or how she becomes a cupcake with lotion:). dana and renee got to see/hear lane talk more and more and how he rules the roost at gpa&gma's house and saw how gage and i sleep in the same position right next to each other. i miss those everyday moments.
they are all so cute and i have pictures to prove it...




4 months old.



we even added to the baby-ness...anna brought over her little stud, bentley. so fun to talk about motherhood with her! gage and bentley are 4 months apart.














at bampa and grandma gwen's house, lane always get to take a shower in their big shower. bampa's in charge of it and lane loves it. he is a grandpa's boy through and through.

we ventured out once with all the kids...





the sleeping arrangements...
the twins in pack.n.plays in the office.



gage in a pack.n.play in the...bathroom.


and lane got the big crib.


bampa and lane went on their first outing with just the two of them. costco and hy-vee. i think being potty trained helps on these outings, i don't know if my dad does diapers...who can blame him.








all the ferry grandkids.



and who of course was entertaining them? bampa!